Paul's family.
We tend to think that Paul just dropped out of the sky; we never think that he had a family, but he did have a family.
Firstly, he was a citizen of Tarsus, born a citizen. That means that his father was a citizen of Tarsus; whether his father purchased his citizenship or was also born one, that we do not know, but we do know Paul was a born citizen, and that could only be so if his father was a citizen. That was a big deal!
Secondly, he had at least one sibling, a sister; her son is mentioned in Act 23:16.
Thirdly, since he obviously had parents, they would most likely have had siblings, Paul's aunts and uncles, and their children would be Paul's cousins, Paul's kinsmen, the people mentioned in Rom 16:
Rom 16:7 Salute Andronicus and Junia, my kinsmen,
Rom 16:11 Salute Herodion my kinsman.
Rom 16:21 Jason and Sosipater, my kinsmen
Fourthly, was Paul married? Had he ever been married? Everyone likes to key in on that.
The Bible does not say. All opinions are taken from inferences of what is written in the Bible, meaning, we are all reading the same passages, and forming our individual opinions based on the same information. A wonderful Christian brother who is now home with the Lord used to say, "When good men stand on opposite sides of an issue, I don't make an issue of it." That is very good advise. Some of us say Paul was or had been married, some of us say he had never been married; Paul does not tell us.
Having said that, my opinion is that Paul had never been married.
Firstly, to answer the easier question, was Paul married when he was traveling around, it seems pretty clear that he was not, based on his statement in 1Co 9:5: "Have we not power to lead about a sister, a wife, as well as other apostles, and as the brethren of the Lord, and Cephas?" Some would say that he had a wife, and was simply saying, "Cannot we take our wives with us?" But he does not say "Lead about OUR WIVES," he say "A wife." That sounds like he did not have a wife. Coupling that with his statement in 1Co 7:8-9: "I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn." I think we can safely say that when Paul was traveling around, and therefore when writing his letters, he was not married.
But had he ever been married? That is another question. The only argument saying he had been, and was therefore a widower, or that his wife had left him, is that Pharisees were generally married, but that is kind of a thin argument, because there were single Pharisees. And again, Paul wrote a fair bit on both widows/widowers and Christians whose un-saved spouses had left them, and never mentions one personal word about either of those situations.
Roman Catholics teach that Paul was single, and use that to teach/demand that their priests must be celibate, but the Bible says that forced celibacy is a doctrine of the demons:
"Now the Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils; Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron; Forbidding to marry" 1Ti 4:1-3
They cannot use Peter, because Peter was married.
Now let us expand our field, and look at other persons prominent in the New Testament.
The family of the Lord Jesus. Again, we come up against Roman Catholic error, for they teach that Mary was a perpetual virgin, meaning that she never had sex, and never had any other children except Jesus. But the Bible says she and Joseph had sex after Jesus was born, and that he had brothers and sisters:
"And [he Joseph] knew her not until she had brought forth her firstborn son: and he called his name JESUS." Mat 1:25
"Is not this the carpenter's son? is not his mother called Mary? and his brethren, James, and Joses, and Simon, and Judas? And his sisters, are they not all with us?" Mat 13:55-56
"Have we not power to lead about a sister, a wife, as well as other apostles, and as the brethren of the Lord, and Cephas?" 1Co 9:5
The words used for "brother and sister" are the normal words for siblings, ie having the same mother.
And others:
Peter's brother was Andrew, who was a fisherman with him. And Peter was married; Jesus healed his mother in law who was sick with a fever.
James and John, brothers, the sons of Zebedee, whose mother was a fairly bold woman of faith. She asks Jesus if her two sons can sit, one on his right hand and one on his left hand, when he entered into his kingdom. She believed Jesus was a king, and boldly asks a favor for her sons.
Phillip and Nathaniel are brothers. And even though Jesus says Nathaniel was "an Israelite indeed, in whom is no guile!" he does not choose him to be one of the 12, he just chooses Phillip.
Barnabas appears to have been unmarried also, based on 2Co 9:5. But he has at lest one sibling, a sister, whose name was Mary, and whose son was Mark, the one who wrote the gospel.
"And when he (Peter) had considered the thing, he came to the house of Mary the mother of John, whose surname was Mark; where many were gathered together praying" Act 12:12
"Aristarchus my fellow prisoner saluteth you, and Marcus, sister's son to Barnabas" Col 4:10
Now back to Paul, to apply this topic.
Paul says he was the son of a Pharisee:
"But when Paul perceived that the one part were Sadducee, and the other Pharisees, he cried out in the council, Men and brethren, I am a Pharisee, the son of a Pharisee: of the hope and resurrection of the dead I am called in question." Act 23:6
Paul was obviously converted in a stunning way, and everyone knew his story; certainly his family did, and there is no way Paul would not have spoken to them about his salvation, Christ, etc, but we read nothing of any one in Paul's immediate family believing. In His greetings in Rom 16, he uses the Greek word for kinsman, not brother or sister, so those people were not Paul's siblings!
THE POINT IS, all of the New Testament people were members of regular, normal, human families, with fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, grandparents, etc.
Application/question: In how many of those families did the following statements of Jesus come true? And note, these statements were made on two separate occasions; these are not the same statements, made on the same occasion, just record differently. Jesus said these things, on two different occasions, using two different figures of speech: a sword and fire.
"Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword. For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law. And a man's foes shall be they of his own household. He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me." Mat 10:34-37
"I am come to send fire on the earth; and what will I, if it be already kindled? But I have a baptism to be baptized with; and how am I straitened till it be accomplished! Suppose ye that I am come to give peace on earth? I tell you, Nay; but rather division: For from henceforth there shall be five in one house divided, three against two, and two against three. The father shall be divided against the son, and the son against the father; the mother against the daughter, and the daughter against the mother; the mother in law against her daughter in law, and the daughter in law against her mother in law." Luk 12:49-53
We in our day, in our religiously pluralistic Western societies, we are not surprised when there is difference of opinion over religion within a family, and so we might think Jesus is being a little melodramatic about the division, and we might certainly be surprised that he would say he did not come to bring peace; isn't that what the angel said: peace on earth. We are not surprised that in one family, there would be members following one religion, and others members following another, BUT in Jesus day this would have been a HUGE thing, in fact it would not have even been possible, because anyone not conforming to the Mosaic Law, was to be put to death! They were all Jews, there was no other religion for them. The thought that Jesus was saying his "Way" would set family members against each other was ASTONISHING.
And later, in the Greek/Roman/Pagan families, leaving the old ways was treason against the State! No one left the patron god of their State or City; families were united around their gods.
This dynamic still occurs in our day in Muslim families, Hindu families, Mormon families, Jehovah's Witness families, Seventh Day Adventist families, Roman Catholic families, and Jewish families. When a member of one of these families becomes a Born Again Christian, and breaks off from the rest of the family, there is a division. In "every" family into which the gospel enters, there will be division; Jesus said it! Jesus said that would be the "natural" out-play of the gospel’s advance; and he said that was why he came!
When I was in college, before I was saved, I had started associating with the Christian group on campus, and fellow student was saved. His name was Richard. He was Jewish. His family held a funeral for him, and kicked him out. He obviously had to leave school. I have often thought of him, and wondered what happened to him.
So too, in all of the families of the New Testament era, we can expect that same dynamic to have existed. Let us not think that those people were exempt from this. Jesus forewarned them.
It was not all lovey lovey, happy happy; there was a sword piercing, conflict happening; there was a fire burning, anger, opposition. And not just division, but foes, which means active enemies! Family betraying family, saying to the Jewish or Roman authorities "My dad is a Christian. My husband is a Christian," knowing that that betrayal would result in the arrest and maybe death of that family member!
"And ye shall be betrayed both by parents, and brethren, and kinsfolk, and friends; and some of you shall they cause to be put to death." Luk 21:16
We in the Western enjoy a level of safety that many, most of our Christian brothers and sisters do not. They are being persecuted, imprisoned, and killed for the sake of Christ. Let us not moan or complain about our lot when people make fun of us for being Christians; our brothers and sisters are being killed.
Maybe rather we should envy them, they are receiving honors in heaven which we will not receive:
And when he had opened the fifth seal, I saw under the altar the souls of them that were slain for the word of God, and for the testimony which they held: And they cried with a loud voice, saying, How long, O Lord, holy and true, dost thou not judge and avenge our blood on them that dwell on the earth?
And white robes were given unto every one of them; and it was said unto them, that they should rest yet for a little season, until their fellow servants also and their brethren, that should be killed as they were, should be fulfilled." Rev 6:9-11
"And I saw thrones, and they sat upon them, and judgment was given unto them: and I saw the souls of them that were beheaded for the witness of Jesus, and for the word of God, and which had not worshiped the beast, neither his image, neither had received his mark upon their foreheads, or in their hands; and they lived and reigned with Christ a thousand years." Rev 20:4
Peter was crucified!
Paul was likely beheaded!
17 April 2026